- letters from Moineddin
February 14, 1977
Moineddin reports in his letter of February 14ththat he “mislaid” the letter from Mansur that he answers. I understand this to mean that Mansur’s letter is not in the file of correspondence that Moineddin kept of this correspondence. This understanding came from a reader [Heather M. Hoppe] who saw the file. It happens that I have a carbon copy, which I present here, so the reader knows to what Moineddin responded. So first, from Naples, Florida, where Mansur and his family were wintering and teaching the letter of Mansur followed by Moineddin’s answer. The subject of both regards the relationship of teacher and pupil in relation to the wife/partner of the teacher.
2848 Van Buren Ave.
Naples, Florida 33940
February 6, 1977
My dear Moineddin, Beloved One of Allah,
There is a recurrent problem I would like to bring to your attention for your adjudication and adgice. It has to do with my relationship to other women mureeds vis-à-vis Ayesha.
As I told her today, “I don’t know whether you’re being narrow-minded or I’m not acting rightly, but I am content to accept your adverse reaction and not do that anymore.”
It has to do with the awakening of heart (my behaviour) and nothing personal, as they say. I feel attracted to certain people Krishna like, even Ramakrishna like (as per Narendra) and the heart responds, or one smiles overmuch, or one gives disproportionate attention.
There is an aspect of tassawuri murshid in all this and it is by now sub-conscious. Again, that had to do with the awakening of hearts.
The funny thing is that to me this is nothing. I am writing this on behalf of Ayesha. Now I know what it is to watch someone you love make eyes at someone else. I guess that is called simply jealousy.
We read out all of Hazrat Inayat Khan’s Confessions at our little celebration in Naples yesterday. I thought it was so sweet the place where he told the Maharaja how he went deep into his feeling to make music. I thought it was so moving when he said he wanted to go into the wilderness to give vent to his many thoughts and emotions that he experienced in the city.
There is no doubt in my mind that murshid was on the path with us in search of an outlet for his deep emotion.
I am experiencing the confinement expressed in the saying The lover is a dead thing, the beloved is all. Or Is love pleasure, is love merriment, no love is longing constantly…saying Thou not I.
Perhaps I have not been longing enough for the abstract God. I have been attending constantly to the pleasure and displeasure of Ayesha, my earthly beloved. I told Pir Vilayat, “The last two years has been trying to make Ayesha happy. He says we are ready to begin.
I long for an outlet to my emotions. I am not looking for an extra-marital relationship. My heart concentration is beginning to crack the rock. There is nothing more but to write,
February 14, 1977
Dear Mansur, O Victorious One,
Peace be with you; Allah mu barak!
Your last letter dealing with how to express Krishna-energy, and still not invite Ayesha’s jealousy, as been mislaid. But I think I remember the gist of it well enough to comment.
How did Murshid do it? Well, he always placed his Krishna-expressiveness within the context of spiritual teaching. He didn’t just come on like Sri Krishna; he would say to those involved tht this was a special concentration to experience bliss or ecstasy. Then afterwards he would return to a more or less sober view. In fact, it wasn’t just with the Krishna-energy that he did this; he treated all types of intensification in the same manner, including the Walks, etc. He always kept the rein.
And even though Murshid was not married, he too had to deal with potential jealousies among his women mureeds, and perhaps with his men mureeds too. But he would always say that God wanted something to be a certain way, and that usually satisfied people. For instance, Murshid danced and gave Darshan to all the ladies in the Krishna Dances, but Jemila was Radha. I feel that you too can dance with all the ladies, but Ayesha must be Radha. This will allow her the central role she deserves—and is in your life-yet will permit more broadness, and a diminution of jealousy, from Ayesha toward the other ladies.
I consider myself very fortunate that Fatima permits me the scope necessary to transmit the types of spirit needed by the various women mureeds, without evidencing any jealousy. For despite the fact that many of my women mureeds may receive specific applications of one’s heart-energy, Fatima has my whole heart, even my soul. It used to be based on simple human love and faith, but now it has matured to a form of spiritual realization. Her soul is the reality, and that is the altar at which one worships.
Fatima and the children were surprised to find heart-shaped boxes of Valentine’s candy on their breakfast plates this morning. I also bought a new volume entitled “The Kabir Book” (translations by Robert Bly) for Fatima on this day. It’s putout by Beacon Press in paperback—44 poems, all very simple and direct. You and Ayesha would love it. One of the poems is called “The Only Woman Awake is the Woman Who has Heard the Flute.”
We saw th movie “Rocky” last night. It’s one of the best I’ve ever seen, and Fatima loved it too, as did Faz’l and Pythia. What with all the junk being screened nowadays, it was so satisfying to see a movie with a heating heart and real people.
The weather here is ‘perfect’ but not complete. In other words, we hare having beautiful blue skies, fragrant spring breezes—but none of the needed rain we wish would come. All is from God…
Om Hari Om,
Moineddin and Fatima
P.S. Shabda and Tamam and their boy Ammon just returned last week from several months in India. He was made a Sheikh by Pir Vilayat at the New Delhi URS.